Do you believe me when I say that age is just a number ! Well, you must believe me because its only the body which is attacked by that number, mann toh chanchal hi rahta hai. If our mann is chanchal means it remains young forever! I have seen old age at very very close quarters in my parents and in-laws. Instead of being scared of the process, I want to keep age on my side and learn to handle it gracefully. Firstly, I must look at people older than me and feel younger. I have to change the way I perceive things. If we do not change with time we will be left behind all alone. If I look at someone younger and pine to be like that person in looks and dressing, then I have a major problem ! So , age gracefully. Look up not down...
I must think of all that I have wanted to do but couldnot because of all the responsibilities God bestowed on me ! I used to read a lot so maybe I can just read which will take care of my mental health and also the time available. I love to write so maybe I can think of writing a book , well Iam seriously thinking about it.!!! I can look at the varied experience I have and impart that education to the less fortunate, maybe volunteer to teach ! Iam very passionate about the girl child issue and want to educate all the girls I can and feel proud at their achievements. I want to reach out to the less fortunate who cannot afford to go to schools , women who have to fend for themselves because the husband is a drunkard and doesn't work, women who have to bring up their kids single handedly and here Iam also talking about the upper middle class where rearing up the kids is still the sole responsibility of the woman.
Its very important for us to realise that nobody is indispensable ( we realise it very late in life), actually why we do not realise it is because we do not want to let go .....of anything, we do not want to delegate because we are scared that it will diminish our value. How wrong are we ? If we have to move ahead , we must pass on our responsibilities to the younger generation and let them take over. This is a very important step to liberate oneself and stay happy. My mother-in-law did that and never interfered thereafter. She focussed on her reading and spirituality as also her few friends. It was very unfortunate that last year she fell sick and that blow changed her outlook from being strong to being unsure, insecure, scared. Its extremely unnerving to see your parents so helpless. I have been unfortunate to painfully witness these changes happen to my mother-in-law ,father-in law, mother and my father. At times I have cried the entire night because the hands that held you so that you do not fall, are now seeking that support from you. The mind which always found solutions to all your problems is looking for solutions to its own problems. The eyes which disciplined you by just one look are now seeking your presence and approval . The wavering wrinkly hands need to be held, the unstable steps need to be supported and most of all they need to be given something very precious for their age...Our time !
We have to understand that our requirements change with time. When we are younger we are surrounded by parents, realtives, friends, there is so much to achieve and so much to do that we have no time for anything else, not even to sit with our grandparents and listen to what they have to say. As we grow older we spend all our time earning money to support young kids, parents, our own aspirations,. As we grow even older there are weddings at home, our children get married and we are busy still. A little more older and our responsibilities start shrinking , younger generation is taking over. Now we need time from others which they don't have because of the same vicious cycle. We start pondering if they are the same kids whom we have brought up ! Nobody has Time.
I will come to where we started from, I must keep myself busy with what I have always wanted to do rather than eyeing the door for someone to come in for me. Its not easy but I will do it. May God give me the strength and good health to lead a happy and fulfilling old age which will not be dependent on others . I must learn from my life, from the mistakes that my parents inadvertently committed which hurt me no end. Let me not do it to my son. I have happy that I have given TIME to my aging parents and in-laws , so no regrets and guilt on that account.
So, age gracefully and keep yourself occupied even if it means reading a book for hours or watching TV , and pray to God to give us good health.
